i want to talk about how we shed layers of skin
for years until we are no longer ourselves
i am interested in this rebirth
i am afraid of the space i take up
whether invisible or on display
a mockery or ghost
sometimes too much
often not enough
i picture a snail
slow moving and simple:
are they also always thinking of things
that are safe versus things that are not safe?
i started a list of things i want people to know
without ever having to tell them:
the new common language
& i will read it to you if i ever have the courage to spare
the truth is i am on a side quest
to learn every definition of loss
so i can remind you we’re not yet gone
that there are things in this world older than fear
& that to be soft is (sometimes) to be unbreakable
my secret is to pretend for a moment
that i am in love with everyone i meet
i am in love with you
& wonder in which ways
we will ask each other to change
courtney marie is a writer & artist based in denton, texas. they are the author of don’t get your hopes up (2018, Thoughtcrime Press) and have a forthcoming full-length poetry collection to-be-released in 2021 with Goliad Media. cm enjoys making weird & sentimental art with/for their community, exploring the world, and playing pinball. they live with two three cats, cry all the time, and are forever writing letters & sending snail mail in a desperate attempt to connect with the outside world. cm is the co-founder & director of the artist collective spiderweb salon.
photo by Olga Drach (via unsplash)
Crow & Cross Keys 